4:} Pa Can't Close Pandora's Box

Pa,
wearing his old,
familiar sweater-vest
along with a puzzled face,
opens the door. It takes a few
moments for him to recognize me
in the fading light.
“Michael!
What are you
doing here?"


Unable
to contain the
excitement inside
I cheerfully manage,
"I dropped by for a visit,
and say hello to everyone!”
Around the room a crescendo of voices
repeat my name as if trying to remember…
“Michael? Michael! Where did you come from?”
Retorting confident in the equality we
all now share as adults,
“I walked!"

“You walked here?
All the way from Mission Hill?”
On the other side of the living room,
by the kitchen door huddle Ma, Aunt Mary
and Uncle Sonny. All are smiling but still.
Other shapes move in the dimness but
are unfamiliar. I know it's not my
father or uncle Jackie. They
wouldn't remain quiet at
seeing me here.
I look for an
opening

to step
further in
but no one
makes room for me.
“Ohhh, Michael!”
Pa quivers in lament
“Why are you here?”
“To surprise you!”
Negativity slowly
transforms
delight
into
confusion,
then dread.
“Michael,
you have to go.”

Pa trembles under the
conviction behind his words.
“I'll only be here a few minutes,
just as soon as I catch my breath...”
“No, you don’t understand, Michael,”
Pa slowly and clearly enunciates,
“You - have - to - go!”
“Pa,”
I plead,
and continue
stammering perplexedly,
“I just wanted to surprise you.
I promise I won’t be…”
“You can't stay!”
Clearly-rising
ire rings

through
the meekness
of his personality,
“You can’t be here!
You have to leave now!”
His
words
are charged
as if from fear,
source not apparent,
to quicken the scolding
formed upon quivering lips.
A few surreal moments later,

twilight again greets me in
it's comfort of solace
to accompany
me on the
journey
back.
Muted thought
numbs the mind's
monstrous hallucination
to obscure subliminal
in the ether.